This final episode is about healing from Complex Trauma. Complex Trauma needs to be dealt with or it will continue to influence your life. You will have very difficult ways of coping with life and have relationships that are set up to fail.

The inner world of someone who has been subjected to trauma is a battleground between the forces of discouragement and the forces of hope and determination. So what do you have to do? Firstly it is possible to heal from Complex Trauma. The goal is a) you need to reconnect with emotions, learn to be vulnerable and be in touch with who you really are and b) to understand resilience, in other words, to transform your trauma into a skill set that will make you better and stronger.

Dealing with trauma is a marathon and not a sprint, so you need to practice healthy self-care whilst going through this process. Complex Trauma needs to be dealt with at two levels. The first level is to deal with the issues that affect you today – in the present, and secondly to go to a therapist in order to work with your past which will involve grieving, getting in touch with emotions and feelings that come out of your past, being able to express all of these feelings and experiences in a safe environment.

You need to understand that you learnt survival skills as a child and did the best that you could at the time. There is no point in beating yourself up now when you realise that these coping skills are flawed.

It is not possible to heal from Complex Trauma on your own and you need to reach out for help. Inevitably people with Complex Trauma find it difficult to ask for help for fear of appearing too needy or for fear of getting hurt again. The best person for this is a therapist who will treat you with unconditional positive regard and accepts you for what you are and with whom you can develop an intimate relationship, encouraging you to discuss your deepest issues.

An important part of dealing with trauma, is renewing your mind and learning to understand the negative internal self-talk that you have developed is not the truth. You need to begin to learn to challenge your thoughts replacing them with positive self-talk. Research has shown that the way that we think affects every part of your body, so it’s essential to understand your emotional reasoning in order to heal.

If you would like to find out if you have Complex Trauma please phone me for a free telephone assessment.